Hard...

I can't understand myself, I'm still in love with D. As much as I try to be just he's friend my feelings are still there.

He wants me to forget the past and what we had, how can I do that? How can you forget some of the best moments you had, that made you feel cherished and loved. As much as i desperately want this to end, to find ANY reason to be turned off by him, my feelings just grow stronger each day. 

I get he's married and he wants to be just friends but how can someone say to you that they are falling in love with you and then just expect you to forget it all??

Why can't he see my effort? Why can't he see that as much as it hurts me I'm cutting down on the amount we talk? You get someone used to something and then from one minute to the next you expect them to just stop doing it, it's like asking an addict to quit from one minute to the next.

A

...

This between him and me is getting worse,  we are driving each other crazy and away.
We talked today and we both agreed that this isn't doing any good to us.
I wish I didn't have feelings for him it would make it easier to just be friends.
I want to be his friend and I don't want to loose him, but imagine me as his friend and having to listen to him talking about his wife, his family or that he does find someone else like he found me, even if I do get over these feelings for him they won't go completely there will always be something there.
I'm trying to be just his friend,  I really am.
And like when he says we can meet up for dinner or drinks,  that's hard to believe that he will do it as he hasn't had the time to see me these last 5 months how will he have the time now? Wish he wouldn't say we could do that, its giving me hope of seeing him again and that's not happening,  I would do anything to see him even for 10 minutes, to touch him one last time, to have him make love to me one last time.
Wish he could have those feelings of being close to loving me again but he will never have them again.
Don't know what to do anymore.

A

Confused

I don't know where I stand with him, one minute he just wants to be friends the next he is saying he likes me more than friends.
He then makes me feel like he is lying to me about how he actually feels and apparently I'm to blame for that.
I don't know what to do or what to feel. At the moment I feel hurt by the tone he is having with me and how he is talking to me.
Supposedly I'm a very close friend of his, you don't talk cold and with a tone to your friends like they are bothering you.
Maybe I should just give up and just be his friend and just stick to that even though I have stronger feelings for him.
God I'm so confused.

A

In love with my best friend!!

I’m in love with my best friend and I'm  not quite sure if the biggest part of the heartache is knowing we’ll probably never be together or never getting the time to tell him what I’m really going thru on the inside..I thought if i agreed to just being physical relationship maybe it would help me see him as just a friend with benefits and no longer thinking what it felt like to be in his arms and now i long for that feeling non stop. The way he talks about his wife to me i can see how much he loves her and i have to put on a smile and take the backseat while I’m in love with him and longing for his touch. Times it think if it wouldn't  just be easier tell him i can’t stand to be his friend cause i love him and I’m hurting that much inside that it breaks me down just to see him, but I’ve never had a friend like him and can’t stand the thought of life without him a part of it, so i been trying to keep it in. I’m willing to bury my pain put on a smile and be there if he need me only thing is each time i see him again it’s like i just took another leap forward in love. I can't  lose my truest friend I’ve ever had, he’s off with his family as i sit here trying to remember how to breathe as tears roll down my face….

In your eyes I believe.
In your arms I feel safe.
If you have something to give me
I wish it could be your love.
When you touch me I smile,
when you look at me I understand
that we just need time.
I just don't want to cry anymore
it is not fair for me,
I still have feelings
my heart isn't a stone!
Don't give me wrong hopes
tell me all the truth
and I will give you everything
I have inside of my heart
for you.
Be always special!